Op-Ed written by True Love
I know most of you don’t believe I exist and, frankly, except for medieval fairy tales and certain movies from the golden years of Hollywood my existence is considered likely more the result of chance.
Not something you could aim for, right?
Yet on another level I am quite popular, sought for in the abstract. They use me to sell everything from washing powder to make-up to cars. So I must be a hidden desire that most people won’t admit to.
Lets face it, for those that do believe, the gender split would be heavily weighted towards she/her; a counterbalance to the drudgery of reality, the lack of agency and the absence of any real respect.
I know, too, that he/him seeks me in perfection. They imagine I can be found in the exquisitely shaped lip, long flowing hair and a body meant more for carnal knowledge than as a vessel for creation.
You all think I should be effortless. And in a way I do take no effort. Sometimes you will find me between two people that have accidentally been thrown together and have been that way for a while. I believe it’s what the psychology text books would call attachment by proximity. It’s what happens in marriages, sometimes. There are other examples. Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome?
Maybe I should be more specific, so bear with me a moment while I parse myself.
From the thesaurus. True:- real, authentic, genuine, faithful. The dictionary is a little less imaginative: in accordance with fact or reality; accurate or exact.
And all of that is accurate.
But Love more profoundly describes how I exist. Love renders the effort effortless. If love is there the action is a given. Love is paying attention. Love is caring; to be concerned with the physical and emotional well being of the other. Love is true attachment lightly held. There are no limits to where you may find me. I can be anywhere. I am a choice. I am not just about romance; I’m about family and friendship and community.
As for being random and out of reach for most, the reach should be within, to that space squeezed in between ego, pride and expectations. If only you might grow that with observance of not only your own but the other’s humanity.
Don’t worry, I will never be forced on you because I am authentic and exact. You will never find me where I don’t belong. That’s only fair, don’t you think?
My time hasn’t come yet, after all the idea of me is only a few hundred years old. These things take time to catch on though I’m not sure I will ever be viral; much is the pity.
But I see glimpses of the future and I have hope, in the meantime, you just never know where you may find me, I may take you by surprise.
